


Living Again

by Elfflame



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-12
Updated: 2007-12-12
Packaged: 2017-10-19 05:35:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/197484
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Elfflame/pseuds/Elfflame
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>For Snapesgirl: SS/RL</p>
            </blockquote>





	Living Again

**Author's Note:**

  * For [snapesgirl62](https://archiveofourown.org/users/snapesgirl62/gifts).



The house hadn’t been lived in for almost four years when Remus returned. He hadn’t lived in the place since going with Sirius to clean up Grimmauld Place between Harry’s fourth and fifth years. When he’d bought it, it had been a place near the Welsh forests to give Moony a place to run during the Moon.

It was finally over, and everyone else could live again. But not Remus Lupin. He’d always known what his fate would be, but he’d allowed himself to hope for a moment that things might be different. Until a flash of green light had ended the life of his bride.

Let Andromeda raise his son. He had no heart for any of it any more. He’d simply come here to die. Alone. The way a werewolf was meant to.

The knock on his door less than a week later was entirely unwelcome. At first he ignored it, but when the intruder continued to knock, he found himself growling out, “Go away.”

The knocking stopped, and Remus let himself relax. But then a voice he recognized far too well answered, “No.”

He had to be hearing things, didn’t he? Remus stumbled to his feet, knocking over the near-empty bottle of firewhiskey so that the last dregs of it dripped into the overly full ashtray, and stumbled to the door. “Sev?” he asked, astonished, as he opened it.

The man on his doorstep made a sour face as he looked him over, still as hook-nosed and sallow-faced as Remus remembered. “Who else?” he asked.

“But…Harry said…you’re dead.”

“Yes. The better to finally live my life.” He glanced over Remus’s shoulder at the mess behind him. “I see you have chosen to stop yours?”

Remus flushed. “Dora…” He swallowed.

“Of course. She is the only person who matters, isn’t she?” he asked sourly.

“Sev…”

“Spare me.” Severus pushed past him and into the room, his nose wrinkling, then waved his wand and vanished the ashes, stale smoke, cigarette butts and whiskey before turning back to Remus. “Are you telling me that you would rather die than live? That you have no wish to see your son grow up, become as obnoxious as your wife and your friends, marry and get you a whole litter of grandpuppies?”

Wincing, Remus shifted awkwardly in the open doorway. “Sev…I…” He swallowed, looking down. No one had been able to get to him like this. Not since he’d woken after the battle, bruised and sore, but still whole. Just short a wife. But then Sev had always been different.

“Spare me, Lupin.”

The use of his last name caused Remus to wince again. “Why do you care anyway?” he finally asked, morose once more.

“You might have chosen her…”

Remus looked up, glaring. “You had shown what we all thought was your true colours! And…I…did care for her…”

“Yes. Enough to marry her less than two months later? And how quickly was that boy born? Are you certain he is even yours?”

Remus snarled, moving forward, not even aware of what he was doing until he had Severus pressed against the wall. “Take it back!”

Severus sneered. “Why should I? According to my sources, this is the most life you’ve shown since the battle.” His nostrils flared. “You stink of whiskey and smoke. Worse than Black. I would never have thought you would sink so low.”

At the mention of Sirius, Remus deflated, backing away, his hands dropping to his sides. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Doesn’t it? You want me to just leave, so that you can sink even further into your depression?”

“What do you care?”

The hand striking his cheek was unexpected, and he blinked up at Severus. “Don’t you think I could be anywhere by now, Lupin? Why do you think I even bothered?”

“Well, you certainly couldn’t be bothered to tell me the truth,” Remus growled, touching his stinging cheek gingerly.

Severus huffed, then pulled himself rigid. “This was a waste of time. Forget you even saw me…” He turned toward the still-open door.

Even as befuddled by whiskey as Remus was, he was still fast. “No. Sev…” He sighed. “I’m sorry. It’s just…so hard.”

“And you think you are the only one for whom that is true? Your mother-in-law is mourning you, certain you are dead, as well as her daughter and her own husband. And the Weasleys lost a son. You think you are the only one who has suffered?”

“No! But…haven’t I suffered enough?” He sighed, sinking down in a chair, his head in his hands. “Don’t I deserve a bit of happiness?”

Severus was quiet for a long time, then sank down before him, his dark eyes looking up into Remus’s face. “Not if you do not take it when offered, you fool.” It was said softly, the bite in the words but not in the tone.

Remus reached out to stroke his cheek. “Sev…I thought…”

“Shhh…” Severus leaned close, then pressed his lips to Remus’s. Remus sighed, relaxing into the kiss, his heart pounding in his chest at the thought that perhaps, just perhaps, he might not have lost everything after all.


End file.
